The Imaginary Smoker
Goleta Valley, CA
A San Marcos Road resident contacted authorities when a man wearing only boxer shorts and a brown T-shirt wandered into her back yard. Making contact with the mumbling intruder, the resident quickly realized the young man was hallucinating. Leading him back to her driveway, she gave the disoriented man a glass of water, and waited for law enforcement to arrive on the scene.
Continually exhibiting bizarre behavior and talking to himself, the male was transported to the station for questioning and drug testing. Unable to stay focused, the young man was reminded to urinate in the cup. However, instead of urinating, the man lifted the cup in an attempt to drink from the empty beaker.
Throughout the interview, it was noted in the report, the subject continually puffed on an imaginary cigarette.
After a painstaking dialogue, the 18-year-old, who admitted smoking “laced marijuana†at a party the night prior, was arrested for being under the influence of a controlled substance.
Found in the Goleta Valley Voice
August 13th, 2007 at 1:34 am
Honest officer, I really didn’t know it was laced…. and would you happen to have a lite? My cigarette won’t stay lit. HEY, who drank my beer! lol
August 13th, 2007 at 9:12 am
On the bright side, if this imaginary cigarette satifies the urge, it may just revolutionize the smoking cessation industry. Plus, the dude doesn’t have to worry about all of the pitfalls related to smoking: stained teeth and fingers, bad breath, coughing, burn holes in his clothes, etc.
And the best thing? He can smoke after sex without stepping outside!
August 13th, 2007 at 10:41 am
Some people will smoke anything….
August 13th, 2007 at 3:37 pm
I usually smoke after sex, but haven’t caught on fire yet.