Small Town Misfit

Rio Grande, NM
5:33 p.m. An Arby’s employee said three women were trying to sell sex to the restaurant’s customers and doing drugs by the dumpster. Police advised the ladies to leave.

Found in the Rio Grande Sun

Goleta Valley, CA
After receiving a call from a concerned mother, deputies went in search of her 25-year-old son, who was believed to be in the midst of a personal crisis. However, when deputies reached him at a Hollister Avenue residence, they found the young man alive and safe. Noting peculiar behavior, deputies asked the man if he’d been using illegal drugs.

Sheepishly, he admitted snorting “about a bump” of cocaine earlier “in a port-a-potty.” During further questioning, he told deputies a “cute sorority girl” he’d met at a volleyball tournament earlier that day had given him the drug. He used it, he said, because she was “good looking.”

The man, arrested for illegal drug use, was later released.

Found in the Goleta Valley Voice

Olmstead Falls, OH
A Columbia Gas employee called police to report a suspicious bag lying on a tree lawn on Columbia Road.

The man believed the bag contained marijuana.

An officer responded to the area and retrieved the bag.

The bag contained potpourri.

Found in the News Sun

Chaska, MN
A man and his 15-year-old son were in a truck traveling on County Road 140. The father was driving, while his son was hanging out the window, striking mailboxes with a silicone gel wrist support. A witness called the police. Officers located the truck a short time later. A marijuana pipe was found in the father’s possession. He was charged with criminal damage to property, reckless driving, contributing to the delinquency of a minor and possession of drug paraphernalia. The son was charged with criminal damage to property.

Found in the Star-Tribune

Erie County, NY
A Depew man was in Lancaster Town Court when he approached a police officer and asked if he had to sign in for court. The police officer immediately smelled the odor of burnt marijuana on the man and escorted him outside. The suspect said, “I know what you’re going to ask me. I have some marijuana in my truck.” The officer found a clear, plastic bag containing the substance and a glass smoking pipe. The suspect was taken to the police station, charged, released on his own recognizance and returned back to court for the original citation.

Found in the Bee News

Rio Grande, NM
5:28 p.m. - A White Swan Road caller said her neighbors “stole her bird and placed it dead on the window.” She said they left their initials on the window next to the bird. Deputies went to the neighbors to question them but the adults of the household weren’t home.

5:30 p.m. — A Shadowood Lane caller said there was a lot of drug activity going on and she had been calling drug enforcement but nothing was getting done. She said her neighbors had been harassing her and “when they placed the dead bird on the window they left their initials.” No report was taken by the police.

Found in the Rio Grande Sun

Cincinnati, OH
A Kmart pharmacist in Forest Park got a shock when he returned to the pharmacy following a break Tuesday evening.
The pharmacist told police he saw a man he didn’t know taking powerful drugs from a locked metal cabinet that had been pried open.
Police arrested Justin Hobbs, 28, who is homeless, and charged him with breaking and entering and 11 counts of possession of drugs.
The pharmacist, who works at the 12171 Omniplex Drive store, told police he’d returned from a break at 9:35 p.m. to find Hobbs taking the drugs. He said Hobbs gained entry to the pharmacy through the customer service window at the counter.
Hobbs is accused of stealing powerful pain killers, like oxycodone.

Found in the Cincinnati Enquirer

Thanks Luann!

Columbia, SC
Stop means stop! Police pulled over two men for not stopping at stop signs Feb. 12. A 25-year-old man was blue lighted on Broad River Road. As officers approached to get his license and registration they noticed that he had a mouthful of pot he was trying to eat to prevent them from seeing it. The cops shot him with a Taser stun gun when he did not comply with their requests to step out of his car and spit out the marijuana. The other man, 18, was pulled over near Oxford Commons. He had a pill bottle full of pot in his glove compartment. An officer saw it when the man went to retrieve his registration. And while the officer was moving around the car to get a better look, the 18-year-old grabbed the bottle and tried to hide it between his legs. When that didn’t work he threw the bottle out of the window. Both men were arrested and jailed, mostly for being really, really dumb.

Found in the Free Times

Tracy, CA
10:57 p.m.: A man on the 1200 block of West 11th Street reported that he found black trash bags filled with marijuana while he was sifting through a trash bin, and he wanted to know if Crime Stoppers would give him a reward.

and…

8:57 a.m.: A caller from Hawkins Elementary School, 475 Darlene Lane, said that prescription bottles had been found in a trash bin.

Found in the Tracy Press

Goleta Valley, CA
With the pair of Victoria’s Secret panties he was wearing poking out from under his red denim jeans, a shirtless man approached a Kaiser Avenue home, talking gibberish and refusing to leave. The concerned homeowner, who had never seen the young man before, called authorities for help.

Arriving on the scene around 11:30 a.m., deputies located the subject talking to other residents nearby. Behaving oddly and unable to stand still, the 19-year-old was apprehended for further questioning. Explaining how “after years of pain” he was finally “loving himself,” the “frantic” man continued his one-sided dialogue of peace, love and joy.

When asked about trespassing the man replied, “I wouldn’t leave their property until they told me from the bottom of their heart they wanted me to leave.”

Believed to be under the influence of a hallucinogenic, he was arrested and transported to jail for further drug evaluation.

Found in the Goleta Valley Voice

Grass Valley, CA
A man in the police station lobby reported finding what appeared to be methamphetamine in front of a business on the 100 block of Neal Street. Police determined the substance was not meth, it was an emergency snakebite kit.

Found in the Union

Charleston, SC
A man was caught trespassing in a downtown parking garage. When asked for identification, the man gave the officer court papers from a previous arrest for trespassing in another parking garage. As the officer was reading the document, the man asked “if I could get one last smoke in before going to jail,” and pulled a crack pipe out and put it to his mouth.

Found in the Charleston City Paper