Small Town Misfit

Federal Way, WA
On March 26 at 2400 S.W. 336th St., a Jack In The Box employee reported a man was urinating in the drive-through. Police contacted the man and placed him in custody.

Found in the Federal Way Mirror

Chico, CA
12:18 a.m. Sex fondle and battery reported on the 1000 block of Nord Avenue. “Female reporting party went behind Speedy Burrito to urinate, and when she pulled down her pants to get the deed done, a transient sleeping nearby asked for oral sex while she was there. She freaked, ran off in a drunken stupor, tripped and bit her lip.”

Found in the Orion

Columbia, SC
A 30-year-old woman said she saw a car with four young men in it drive up to the North Main Street Citgo where she works. Two of them came into the store after a minute. She said the men come by the Citgo often, but on Jan. 29 they were acting suspiciously. When she walked down an aisle to see what the men were doing she saw one of them, fully exposed, urinating on the floor and a display shelf with items for sale. The men fled the scene quickly. Apparently they are known around the neighborhood as the “Stick Up Boys.”

Found in the Free Times

Orange County, CA
Hotel employees reported that they tried to evict a guest after receiving complaints that the guest was urinating from the balcony. The guest and his party were refusing to leave, 10:34 p.m.

Found in the Orange County Register

Atlanta, GA
A Marietta woman needed to use the bathroom around 4 a.m. at a gas station on Spring Street. When she couldn’t get into the bathroom, she got anxious and walked out a door marked “Emergency Use Only,” a manager noted. He told her to come back inside. He said she proceeded to squat and urinate on the side of the building. The manager said he got his security guards, and the woman ran around the building and scaled a large fence. “This must have been difficult, given her attire,” a police officer noted. (She was wearing a dress and high heels.)

The woman’s story: She couldn’t get into the bathroom, and she was afraid she was going to pee on herself. She said she did the only thing she could: exit quickly and urinate. She said she wasn’t trying to be malicious, but she had to pee really bad. She apologized to police and the store manager. She said she thought all the attention about the incident was a little extreme. The officer asked, “Why did you jump the fence?” The officer noted her reply: “She didn’t really have an answer, but only stated she didn’t understand why they wanted her picture.” She got a ticket for public urination.

Found in Creative Loafing

Grass Valley, CA
At 2:03 p.m., a caller from the 16000 block of Duggans Road reported that a neighbor threatened to turn him in for having horses running loose on his property and threatened to drive her car into a horse and kill it if she saw one on the road. Before leaving, she threw rocks at the caller and swerved her car toward some horses.

And…

At 8:38 p.m., a caller from Robin Avenue reported that a man stood outside of his parked truck urinating and exposing himself to the public. Deputies advised the man to use a bathroom.

And…
At 8:58 p.m., a caller from a business on the 100 block of Neal Street reported that a man asked for a free sandwich and made a scene when he was denied.

And…

At 9:13 p.m., a caller from Nevada Street reported that a man driving a dark Honda sedan stopped his car in the middle of the street, got out and lit something on fire.

Found in the Union

Clovis, NM
Around midnight June 30 officers were called to a home in the 400 block of West Plaza Drive for a report that a man was urinating on a woman.

Inside the home, police found a woman visibly upset with red marks on her face and neck. The officers noted an intoxicated man yelling at them to leave. Witnesses told officers they saw the woman in the driveway and the man yelling to the driver of a truck to run her over. The woman refused to cooperate with police. Police arrested her husband for battery on a household member.

Found in the Clovis News Journal

Chadron, NE
8:10 a.m. Caller from the 800 block of Shelton St. advised there was a male subject near the fire escape on the north side of the above location. Caller advised he had a bunch of clothes that he had lying on the ground in front of him. Caller called back at 8:54 a.m. and advised the same subject from previous complaint is back and has just urinated on the church and now is attempting to try to get into every door of the building. Caller advised his wife is inside and has locked herself inside.

Found in the Chadron Record

Clovis, NM
Around 6 a.m. Tuesday an officer patrolling Main Street saw a man with his hands in his “genital region” leaning against the corner of a church in the 2600 block.

The officer stopped and the man admitted he had urinated on the church. He also said he was praying.

The officer noted neighbors in the area had complained about the man urinating on the church before.

The officer issued him a citation for disorderly conduct.

Found in the Clovis News Journal

Parker, CO
A door-to-door magazine salesman allegedly urinated on a Parker woman’s front porch May 24 after she refused to buy anything from him. According to a report, the 20-year-old Georgia man attempted to sell the woman magazines at her house on the 10100 block of Severn Lane at approximately 9:42 a.m. After she said no, she looked out the window to check if he was gone and noticed a long, wet trail from her baby stroller to her front door. She immediately called police and deputies were able to track the man down. The man, who didn’t have a permit to sell magazines, initially denied urinating on the woman’s porch but later admitted to it, according to the report. He allegedly said he knew it was “not cool” and doesn’t know why he did it. He was arrested on suspicion of second-degree criminal tampering, disorderly conduct and failure to register for solicitation.

Found in the Castle Rock Police Blotter

Bozeman, MT
A man was warned for peeing on City Hall.

Found in the Bozeman Daily Chronicle

Maybe he was related to this guy.

Goleta Valley, CA
Talking on his cell phone while urinating in the bushes at a public park, a 21-year-old male was approached by deputies. It was 2:30 a.m. when the subject noticed authorities approaching and attempted to flee in the opposite direction. The subject, who was wearing a pink tie, was easy to track and after a short chase he surrendered in the 6500 block of Madrid in Isla Vista.

“I don’t want to be like my friends and get caught by the police,” the suspect whined.
When asked why he ran, he said he initially thought the deputy was a “friend from a frat playing a joke.”

He was arrested for resisting arrest and urinating in public.

Found in the Goleta Valley Voice