Small Town Misfit

Sunnyvale, CA
Someone threw a computer through the window of a Dodge Stratus in the 1300 block of South Mary Avenue. The incident was reported about 8:30 a.m. Saturday.

Found in The Mercury News

Gorham, ME
Lily Lane caller reported that a breeder came into her house and took her cat.

Found in The Gorham Times

California State University
10:51 a.m. Assault and battery reported on the 1200 block of Warner Street. “Reporting party reporting the person she cares for hit her with his cane. Reporting party withdrew money from her back account, and he stole some of it. Subject now is leaving his motorized wheelchair.”

Found on The Orion Online

Anchorage, AK
A 911 caller told Troopers last Wednesday that his ex-girlfriend was pissed off and pounding on the door of his house on Branding Iron Lane. When Troopers arrived, they found the woman hiding inside a dog house on the man’s porch. She was removed, arrested, and charged with criminal trespass in the first degree.

Found in the Anchorage Press

Erie County, NY
Fight broke out at bar between two men over a girl on Sheridan. Upon investigation, it wasn’t really a girl, but a man dressed up like a girl. It was not a Halloween costume, but his everyday attire.

Found in Bee News

North Augusta, SC
A ponytailed, balding white male who drove a white Jeep Cherokee is listed as a suspect in a Nov. 29 shoplifting incident at a discount shop on Knox Avenue, with the take being $130 in “Celine Dion” and “Jennifer Lopez” brands of perfume. The suspect was also described as 30-40 years old, wearing a black hooded sweatshirt, black stockings and flip-flops and measuring about six feet tall and 300 pounds.

Found in The North Augusta Star

Springfield, MT
3:47 p.m., 700 block 64th St. Caller reported her kids were playing in the front yard when a man walking down the street came over and told them he was the “pizza man.” He asked them if they thought “my pizza is good,” and asked them how old he was. Then he left, and police couldn’t find him.

Found in the Springfield News

Durango, CO
2:54 p.m. A woman found a headless “beaver-style” animal in her trash can in the 500 of East 10th Avenue.

Found in the Durango Herald

Brooklyn, OH
On Dec. 4, an employee of the BP gas station on Brookpark Road called 911 after a woman refused to leave the gas station because he would not come out and pump her gas for her. The man told the woman he was not allowed to leave the building, but the woman was insisting he pump her gas. Police arrived and told the woman to go to another gas station.

Found in The Brooklyn Sun Journal

Santa Ana, CA
7:16 p.m. A caller reported a possible transient who was standing in the middle of the street in Coto de Caza and acting as if he were directing a symphony.

Found on The OC Register

Chagrin Falls, OH
A man described as looking like an average Joe seemed high on drugs or alcohol Dec. 1 when he went into a North Main Street beauty salon. He asked for a bikini wax, a process usually performed on a woman.

The salon manager said he would have to wait for the wax to warm up. He decided not to wait and left.

Employees said his voice sounded like the same man who has been calling the salon since Nov. 17 and making bikini wax appointments that he never keeps.

Found in The Chagrin Herald Sun