Small Town Misfit

Asbury Park, NJ
On Aug. 21, police investigated an act of criminal mischief at the construction site at Russell O. Brackman School. Sometime during the evening hours, someone drove a forklift through a portable toilet and fence. Another forklift was driven on top of a trailer. The value of the damage is estimated at $1,000. Patrolman Mark Bernstein took the report.

Found in the Asbury Park Press

Durango, CO
A man was warned for riding a tricycle down Eighth Avenue from the college.

Found in the Durango Herald

Waynesboro, GA
A fist fight broke out at Wal-Mart when a woman attacked an employee last Thursday.

According to witnesses, the employee pulled down the woman’s halter top during the altercation, exposing her chest. The topless woman continued to pull the employee’s hair and kick her in the head.

Store managers were able to stop the fight before officers arrived.

Found in the True Citizen

Grass Valley, CA
At 3:55 a.m., a woman called from the 11000 block of Bedrock Drive to report people were on her roof and in her husband’s shop. One was wearing a plaid shirt and the other was a small child wearing a bear suit. Deputies made contact. What the woman saw was possibly the result of her medication.

Found in the Union

Rio Grande, NM

4:31 p.m. — A Calle del Pajarito frequent caller reported that several local politicians were sexually harassing her. One, she said, was sexually harassing everyone.

5:39 p.m. — The Calle del Pajarito woman called back to say she had relatives coming and she was afraid the people she has to deal with would “sex them.”

8:53 p.m. — The Calle del Pajarito frequent caller called a third time to report young people engaging in foreplay. She said she was tired of it, according to a police log.

Read more calls from this small town misfit in “Everyone’s Out To Get Me”

Found in the Rio Grande Sun

Carrboro, NC
A truck was reported stolen and recovered Wednesday after a break-in at a home on Hillsborough Road.
According to a police report, the truck’s owner found his vehicle had been taken from his yard after someone broke into the home by knocking out several window panes. The perpetrator stole the truck keys and “dumped large amounts of trash and furniture in a hand dug well that was located inside” the house, in addition to stealing several items.

The vehicle was found in the woods behind the victim’s residence, along with some of the items that had been stolen. The damage to the house was valued at $1,450.

Found in the Chapel Hill News

Portsmouth, ME
10:46 p.m. Police took a call from a Wallis Road caller who said he cut his finger off with a meat cleaver during an argument with his wife.

Found in the Portsmouth Herald

Grafton, WI
Four 20-year-old Concordia University students have been cited on suspicion of underage alcohol consumption. The group, which had been celebrating the end of the school year, was at an apartment party in the 2000 block of Chateau Court on May 4. The two women who rent the apartment also were ticketed on suspicion of providing alcohol to underage individuals. When the police arrived at the party, a Menomonie man, 19, tried to flee by jumping from a second-story window. The man injured his leg and was taken to Columbia-St. Mary’s Ozaukee campus. Police said he had not been drinking, but he told them that he thought he would get in trouble for being at a party where alcohol was served.

Found in the Journal Sentinel

Portsmouth, ME
7:33 a.m. A caller told police she had been exposed to rabies seven months earlier and was advised to seek medical attention. The person said she did not want medical attention and after being advised to do so again, hung up on police.

Found in the Portsmouth Herald

Erie County, NY
A subject, later charged with driving while intoxicated, was stopped on Union Road for driving without a front tire and failing to stay in the lane.

Found in Bee News

Boerne, TX

Found in the Boerne Star

Columbia, SC
Two friends were driving down Leesburg Road in a van Nov. 17. They began arguing, and the 34-year-old driver turned up the radio in order to ignore the 35-year-old passenger. The passenger retaliated by yanking the steering wheel, which caused the van to veer off the road and crash into a patch of woods. The van had to be towed.

Found in the Free Times