Small Town Misfit

Columbia, SC
An officer saw a man acting strangely on Assembly Street on May 10. “I’m petting my dog,” the man told the cop. But there was no dog. Perhaps a brief memory of Harvey passed through the cop’s mind, until the aroma of alcohol emitting from the man reached his nose. This wasn’t a glimpse into the paranormal realm, just a man under the influence who was unsteady on his feet while he petted his imaginary dog.

Found in the Free Times

Goleta Valley, CA
Talking on his cell phone while urinating in the bushes at a public park, a 21-year-old male was approached by deputies. It was 2:30 a.m. when the subject noticed authorities approaching and attempted to flee in the opposite direction. The subject, who was wearing a pink tie, was easy to track and after a short chase he surrendered in the 6500 block of Madrid in Isla Vista.

“I don’t want to be like my friends and get caught by the police,” the suspect whined.
When asked why he ran, he said he initially thought the deputy was a “friend from a frat playing a joke.”

He was arrested for resisting arrest and urinating in public.

Found in the Goleta Valley Voice

Clifton, OH
A 25-year-old man is behind bars today on some unusual charges.

Hungry and drunk, Chico Smith forced open two doors at an apartment on Flora Street Saturday, Hamilton County records show.

He helped himself to some chicken wings and soda.

The total value of his theft: $8.

The apartment’s owner wasn’t amused.

Smith was charged Wednesday with theft, damaging, trespassing and disorderly conduct while intoxicated, according to court records.

He is held at the county jail in lieu of $2,000 bond, court officials said.

His next scheduled court date is May 30.

Found in the Cincinnati Enquirer

Thanks Luann!

Columbia, SC
Police were called to a home at 3 p.m. Sunday after a woman said her fiance had attacked her. The woman told deputies she and the man had been drinking for two days when the man got upset with her because the house was dirty. She said she was lying on the couch when the man poured dish soap in her hair and ordered her to take a bath. She said she locked herself in the bedroom but the man followed her and began to drag her by her hair and throw things at her. She said he left when he heard her on the phone arranging a ride to her home.

Found in the State

Hamilton County, OH
For the third time in a month, police have arrested someone for stealing from the blind owner of the deli inside the Hamilton County Courthouse.

Andre Wilson, 43, of Winton Hills, was arrested at 8:30 a.m. today by sheriff’s deputies and charged with two counts of theft.

Kent Parker, the blind owner of the deli, contacted deputies about several items missing from his shop. Deputy Ken Pendleton reviewed videotape from the deli and identified Wilson as the man stealing a fruit pie and drink – valued at $2.30 – from the shop.

At 8:13 a.m. today, Wilson walked into the Courthouse and then into Parker’s first-floor deli.

He was seen stuffing milk, apple pies, juice and 13 Slim Jims – valued at $9.75 — in his pants without paying for the items, the sheriff’s office said.

He was arrested and charged with theft for the two incidents.

Because the charges involve stealing from someone who is blind, each of the charges is a felony.

Found in the Cincinnati Enquirer

Thanks Luann!

Menasha, WI
A man living on Tuckaway Court called police to get them to shut down a bachelorette party that was taking place in his house. Upon arrival on the scene, the caller had gone to bed and his wife was called upon to wake him up and let him know that the party had come to an end.

Found in the Appleton Post Crescent

Thanks Rick!

Columbia, SC
Police were called to a dining hall at 1:30 p.m. Thursday after employees saw a woman stealing food. The employee told officers he saw the woman eating from the buffet and he knew she hadn’t paid since she didn’t have a plate. When he confronted her, she ran away, he said.

Found in the State

Thanks Ritch!

Cincinnati, OH
When Gary Spoonemore Jr. ran short of cash, prosecutors say, he would set his apartment on fire and live on handouts from the Red Cross.

He admitted to burning a motel room and mobile home and is suspected in four more blazes in Northern Kentucky and Southwest Ohio, Kenton Commonwealth’s Attorney Rob Sanders said.

“It appears the defendant learned he could get money from the Red Cross if he was displaced by a fire,” Sanders said in a written statement. “After that, his homes, all of which were rented, mysteriously started catching on fire whenever he ran short of cash.”

Found in the Cincinnati Enquirer

Thanks Luann!

Columbia, SC
A woman called police at 1 a.m. Friday after she said she had been robbed at gunpoint. The 50-year-old woman told officers that as she was walking down the street, several men approached her and one pointed a gun at her. She said she handed him her $50 cell phone and her book bag containing a $25 textbook. The robber also got her $100 false teeth.

Found in the State

Royal Palm Beach, FL
A man parked his friend’s car at a park in the 100 block of Wildcat Way and returned to find a significant amount of Silly String and dozens of chicken eggs covering the hood. Someone had worn rubber gloves when using the Silly String. The can of Silly String and the gloves were recovered at the scene. A chemical agent in the Silly String caused at least $100 worth of damage to the car’s paint job.

Found in the Palm Beach Post

Orange County, CA
6:38 p.m. Disturbance, 321010 block of Paseo Carolina: Twelve juveniles are in the street throwing bagels at houses and passing cars.

Found in the OC Register

Beachwood, OH
A homeless man was banned May 9 from Borders Books and Music for stealing $1 from the coffee bar tip jar. After learning he was homeless, an employee gave him additional money from the jar.

Found in the Sun Press