Small Town Misfit

Rio Grande, NM
A caller at McDonald’s reported that a Honda that was wrecked on the passenger side was heading south. The caller said she thought she saw a little boy in the fetal position in the trunk of the vehicle. The car could not be located.

Found in the Rio Grande Sun

I’m upgrading Small Town Misfit’s software. Keep your fingers crossed!

Update: Almost there… should be wrapped up by Tuesday night.

Update 2: All complete. Let me know if you see anything funny on the site. You can email me at this link.

Chattanooga, TN
Police answered a call of a man who shot himself in the head on Anne Street.

The man said he had not meant to shoot himself and denied he was trying to kill himself.

A witness said the man got a gun, put it to his head and pulled the trigger. He said the man appeared in disbelief that he was injured by the bullet, which grazed his scalp.

Police were told the man has a lot to drink and plays with guns about every six months.

Found in the Chattanoogan

Grass Valley, CA
At 10:12 a.m., a caller from the 21000 block of Maben Road reported that someone had broken into the house and defecated inside.

Found in the Union

Tracy, CA
6:12 p.m.: A person on the 2300 block of Saffron Court complained that a neighbor mows his lawn in his underwear.

Found in the Tracy Press

Tracy, CA
7:10 p.m.: A woman on the 900 block of West Sixth Street told police that a man in the neighborhood doesn’t like her 10-year-old son and tries to pay other neighborhood kids to beat him up.

Found in the Tracy Press

Goleta Valley, CA
Deputies found a distraught and disoriented 38-year-old woman just before 1 a.m. sitting in a planter at a Hollister Avenue intersection.

During an interview, the woman explained how, after a recent mental evaluation, she’d been released from a medical facility with stronger medications. Since her release just days earlier, she added, she’d only slept a handful of hours and admitted feeling anxiety building. However, she said, she remained happy and “not depressed.”

During a consensual search, the woman, previously in jail for making terrorist threats against law enforcement, warned deputies, “I do have a knife in my pocket. I like knives, but I’m not going to stab you. Besides, you have on a bullet proof vest.”

An ambulance called to the scene transported the woman to the hospital to address her health concerns.

Found in the Goleta Valley Voice

Chadron, NE
7:09 p.m. Caller on the 200 Block of Chadron advised that some subjects had been calling him names and saying naughty words.

And…

12:34 p.m. Caller on Highway 20 advised they are camping at the Grable Ponds at Fort Robinson and there is a crazy person harassing them. Caller stated he keeps speeding by in his car yelling at them. Caller stated she thinks he’s smoking marijuana. Caller stated her kids are scared to death and she’s afraid he’ll be back. Caller requesting assistance.

And…

11:55 a.m. Caller on the 100 Block of Maple advised he just wanted to let the officers know he’s going to start his truck in a little while because he wants to cruise around town. Caller stated the reason why he’s calling is because someone in his neighborhood calls the police every time he starts it so he just wanted it on record as to what he was doing and why.

Found in the Chadron Record

Chadron, NE
8:10 a.m. Caller from the 800 block of Shelton St. advised there was a male subject near the fire escape on the north side of the above location. Caller advised he had a bunch of clothes that he had lying on the ground in front of him. Caller called back at 8:54 a.m. and advised the same subject from previous complaint is back and has just urinated on the church and now is attempting to try to get into every door of the building. Caller advised his wife is inside and has locked herself inside.

Found in the Chadron Record

Scorro, NM
A woman in the 1400 block of Tyler reported at 11:30 a.m. that someone threw marshmallows on her vehicle. She said she thinks she knows the person is but wants to catch them with her camera before she names them. No visible damage to vehicle. No chocolate or graham crackers found either.

Found in the Scorro Police Blotter

Delray Beach, FL
Police saw an intoxicated man driving north in a southbound lane in the 1800 block of South Federal Highway, forcing other cars to swerve to avoid hitting him. After pulling him over, police noticed that his pants were pulled all the way down. He told police he did that because he had been drinking and didn’t want to urinate in his pants.

Found in the Palm Beach Post

At 9:16 p.m., a caller from the 600 block of West Broad Street reported a neighbor had a scented candle burning in his vehicle, but he was inside his home, possibly in bed. An officer responded and blew out the candle.

Found in The Union