Small Town Misfit

Grass Valley, CA
At 6:17 p.m., a caller from the 15000 block of Skaith Bend reported his marijuana was being contaminated by bleach. The caller believed his neighbor was responsible but he did not have any proof his neighbor did it.

Found in the Union

Flatbush, NY
Police allege that George Tsotadze, a resident of the 1340 block of East 69th Street, was arrested on petit larceny charges after he was allegedly caught secreting several sticks of salami into his pants as he shopped at a grocery on the 2250 block of East 16th Street.

The spicy shoplifting attempt was spotted by a security guard, who stopped him as he allegedly tried to leave the store with his meat treats.

The sausage - $75 worth - was recovered.

Found in Flatbush Life

Grass Valley, CA
At 2:03 p.m., a caller from the 16000 block of Duggans Road reported that a neighbor threatened to turn him in for having horses running loose on his property and threatened to drive her car into a horse and kill it if she saw one on the road. Before leaving, she threw rocks at the caller and swerved her car toward some horses.

And…

At 8:38 p.m., a caller from Robin Avenue reported that a man stood outside of his parked truck urinating and exposing himself to the public. Deputies advised the man to use a bathroom.

And…
At 8:58 p.m., a caller from a business on the 100 block of Neal Street reported that a man asked for a free sandwich and made a scene when he was denied.

And…

At 9:13 p.m., a caller from Nevada Street reported that a man driving a dark Honda sedan stopped his car in the middle of the street, got out and lit something on fire.

Found in the Union

Frederick, MD
Police arrested a woman early Sunday after she led officers on a chase on I-270 north of Md. 85, according to Maryland State Police.

Trooper Ryan Shaffer tried to stop a woman, later identified as Diane Dipasquale, about 1:32 a.m. for a traffic violation on I-270, police said. Dipasquale, of Falling Waters, W.Va., continued onto westbound I-70 before taking the exit for U.S. 40A where she drove past a trooper who had set up stop sticks.

Dipasquale stopped after six marked police cars surrounded her, police said. She told police that she was afraid to stop because she believed police impersonators were following her.

Dipasquale was taken to the Frederick County Adult Detention Center and charged with resisting arrest, police said.

Found in the Frederick News-Post

Appleton, WI
A 22-year-old Appleton man reported being grabbed by the throat by his dentist. The patient became upset when all procedures couldn’t be completed in the same day. He tore off his paper bib, and began to swear while heading into the waiting room. The man reported that his dentist grabbed him and threatened him while they were in the waiting room.

Found in the Appleton Post-Crescent

Goleta Valley, CA
Breaking bottles and challenging his dad to a fistfight, a 19-year-old was arrested after deputies were called to subdue the son at a family home along Patterson Avenue.

Upon contact with the young man, deputies quickly concluded he was too intoxicated to care for himself. After giving him a chance to leave the premises and spend the remainder of the evening with a friend, the subject refused, sounding almost elated to head to jail.

“I want to go to county (jail). I haven’t been there in a while,” he boasted.

After his arrest for public intoxication, his wish was granted.

Found in the Goleta Valley Voice

Columbia, SC
A 53-year-old woman withdrew $20 from a Bank of America ATM on Two Notch Road on June 30, and like many others, drove off leaving her card in the machine. Thankfully she realized her forgetfulness before she got very far and returned to the ATM, whereupon she saw a man in his early 20s take money from the machine, but noticed his card was still in his hand. The man gave the woman her card and $100 he had taken from her account. The woman wanted to prosecute him for attempted larceny.

Found in the Free Times

Atlanta, GA
A 42-year-old Buckhead man said he was kicked out of a bar on Piedmont Road because he complained about a group of women who were “sucking their breast” inside the bar. The man said he told the bar manager about this alleged breast-sucking, but the manager didn’t do anything about it. He said a woman walked to him, pulled up her shirt, exposed her breast, and asked, “Do you want to suck on this?” He said the bar manager asked him to leave — and he did. The man said he needed a police report to make a complaint about the bar allowing sex acts inside the business.

Found in Creative Loafing

Atlanta, GA
An officer found a $100 bill on the floor near the metal detector at the entrance of City Hall on Trinity Avenue. The officer said he asked a “gentleman” nearby whether he had dropped the money, and the gentleman said no. The officer noted that about two minutes later, another man walked up and asked, “What are you going to do with the money?” The officer said he was going to turn in the money to the police property division. The officer said he explained police procedure about lost items.

According to the officer, the man identified himself and then “he requested that I split the money with him because all that I was going to do was steal the money.” The officer again explained police procedure about lost items. “He then said, ‘Officer I won’t tell anybody if you and I split the money,’” the officer wrote. Then, the officer explained about the security cameras mounted nearby, and how those cameras could determine who actually lost the $100 bill. “He continued his effort of trying to get me to give him the money and he could split the money with me,” the officer wrote.

The officer told the man to go back to his worksite. He left for a while – and then came back. This time, he told the officer that he lost some money, and he wanted the $100 bill. No charges filed, according to the police report.

Found in Creative Loafing

Cincinnati, OH
Alvin Chambers and Steven Turner, police say, take their jobs very seriously.

Chambers, 24, of South Fairmount, and Turner, 21, of East Price Hill, work for Aaron’s Rental Company and deliver and pick up televisions and other items rented by customers.

But when a 42-inch plasma television was mistakenly dropped off at Juanita Carter’s home in East Price Hill, police say Chambers and Turner decided to get it back – even if no one was home.

The pair, police said, was at her Morrow Place home at 6:55 p.m. Wednesday when they knocked on the front door. There was no answer.

Police said the two went to the side of the house, took an air conditioning unit out of the window and entered the home to retrieve the television.

Chambers and Turner were arrested and charged with burglary.

Both were released today on their own recognizance.

Found in the Cincinnati Enquirer

Thanks Luann!

Clovis, NM
Around midnight June 30 officers were called to a home in the 400 block of West Plaza Drive for a report that a man was urinating on a woman.

Inside the home, police found a woman visibly upset with red marks on her face and neck. The officers noted an intoxicated man yelling at them to leave. Witnesses told officers they saw the woman in the driveway and the man yelling to the driver of a truck to run her over. The woman refused to cooperate with police. Police arrested her husband for battery on a household member.

Found in the Clovis News Journal

Tracy, CA
11:28 p.m.: A man on the 300 block of Ramona Way told police that he accidentally gave his wife some household cleaner when he meant to give her cough syrup. The man called an ambulance, and police took a report.

Found in the Tracy Press