Small Town Misfit

Orange County, CA
A patron of Bulldogs Hookah Lounge, near Beach Boulevard and Ellis Avenue, reported at 12:12 a.m. Sunday that another patron had assaulted him.

An officer arrived and the caller confessed the other man hadn’t actually punched him in the face, but had flicked him in the nose. He said he was “embarrassed in front of his girlfriend and that was unacceptable.”

Found in the Orange County Register

Amherst, NY
A woman on Fifth Avenue called for help when she couldn’t locate a pulse on herself. She was aided and signed off.

Found in the Amherst Bee

Tipp City, OH
An Elas Court resident reported seeing two males rolling around in a yard in the neighborhood and believed both were drunk and fighting.
According to reports one of the males was “flipping out” and had cut his chin after fighting with himself.
A squad was called in for the injuries.
Officers stated they believed the out-of-town man was under the influence of some kind of narcotic. He was handcuffed in the ambulance and taken to UVMC.

Found in the Tipp City Independent Voice

Tipp City, OH
After a caller witnessed several young people (one in a vehicle and six in a truck) verbally arguing while at a gas pump on Main Street, officers arrived and cited several individuals.
One of the individuals was issued further felony charges for allegedly attempting to bust the cruiser window with his head.

Found in the Tipp City Independent Voice

Rio Grande, NM
2:36 p.m. — A County Road 301 caller said their relatives had visited from Utah and wanted to kidnap a child. Police weren’t able to locate any criminal activity.

Found in the Rio Grande Sun

Mukilteo, WA
A party reported that his mother punched him and hit him with a belt, including the buckle. He later told the officer that he had lied and his mother had only tapped him on the head because he was playing with a hot iron.

Found in the Mukilteo Beacon

Canyon Lake, CA
A golf cart accident inside the gates two weeks ago resulted in the arrest of one man while a second was transported to a local hospital with injuries.
The incident occurred Saturday, November 3, at approximately 11 p.m., when the driver of a six-seat golf cart attempted a left turn into the driveway of a residence on the 30300 block of Buck Tail Dr. and the passenger, who was not secured in the vehicle, was ejected. According to responding deputies, the passenger was transported to a local hospital for treatment of injuries including a concussion, while the driver was arrested for felony driving under the influence after failing a field sobriety test.

Found in the Friday Flyer

Atlanta, GA
On Ashby Terrace, a 54-year-old man said he was watching football when his live-in girlfriend got mad because he was watching TV. According to the man, she said: “You better turn off that television or else I’ll mess you up.” He said she had been drinking large amounts of alcoholic beverages all day.

He said the girlfriend went into the kitchen, returned with a can of green beans and threw it at his head. The green-bean can hit his face, causing a cut, he said. Then, he said, she started “going crazy.” He said she pulled a large mirror from the bedroom dresser, and it fell on her own leg. The mirror broke, causing a deep cut on the girlfriend’s thigh. The girlfriend, age 45, was arrested for aggravated assault.

Found in Creative Loafing

Columbia, SC
Officers were called to investigate a civil disturbance on Oct. 19. When they arrived on King Street a 42-year-old woman said that a man, whom she knew only by his nickname, hit her in the face with a frying pan, apparently taking a cue from Daffy Duck. The woman admitted to police that she had taken seven shots of rum and smoked crack earlier that day.

Found in the Free Times

Kalispell, MT
10:08 a.m. A woman confronted a man who was grading the end of the road near her property. She thought he was on her property and that he needed to ask her permission. The man noticed that the woman was carrying a gun in a bucket and called the Sheriff’s Department. The woman claimed that she habitually carries the gun in her bucket for protection. The man was not on her property, therefore neither party was doing anything wrong.

Found in the Flathead Beacon

Waynesboro, GA
Police are trying to figure out who made off with a gazillion worms.

Last Thursday, a Waynesboro woman reported that someone stole an old refrigerator from outside her Dowell Street home.

And it wasn’t just any fridge - the victim had converted it into a bait bed.

According to the report, the fridge was full of live worms, $47 worth to be exact, and has the victim’s name painted across it.

Found in the True Citizen

Goleta Valley, CA
Concern arose after a Montrose Place resident found bloody fingerprints smeared on the outside of his bedroom window. The incident, filed as a suspicious circumstance, occurred in mid-October.

The reporting party said he recalled hearing a “tapping” sound around 4 a.m. one morning.

Found in the Goleta Valley Voice